last night

last night i had a dream that i was on a reality show about bros. at the beginning of the dream, all of the bros and i had to get inside this big ridiculous lifted truck. i wanted to sit in the front, but they informed me that was where the camera man sat. i turn around to find a spot and saw my girlfriend kissing one of them. there were these secret seats. the bro truck was so big that there were a row of seats under the third row of seats. the driver informed me that if he crashed i would die. i told him that i was alright with that.

we get to our destination. surprisingly it was a peaceful grassy field in the middle of nowhere. the bros jumped out of the car and began frolicking, some of them even began jumping rope. i noticed that one of them in particular didn't have a hand. when he caught me staring he turned away and lost his confidence, as his confidence drained he began losing more body parts. eventually he approached me as a full body, smiling and willing to talk. time had passed and i stopped seeing him. an old friend of mine showed up and told me to deal with my problems. he pointed behind a lone pillar in the field.

i walked to the pillar and found the guy. he was only a head sitting by himself, trying to hold his tears back. i remember treating the head like some sort of pet. resting my hand on his hat, asking him what was the matter. he would wobble himself my direction and lean against my leg, telling me i wouldn't understand, eventually forcing out these words.

"i can't do this anymore. i can't take this anxiety, this panic"

i frantically jumped up to face him.
sharing with him everything i had learned.
giving advice i didn't even know i had.
we spoke until he became whole again.
we spoke until i became whole again.

My father chills with the neighbor kids.

Sometimes the doorbell rings and I'm forced to run upstairs and answer it because no one else is home. I open the door and there they are, two little Mexican kids. A boy and a girl asking if my dad is home, hahaha.

He teaches them about organic gardening and stuff, sometimes shows them DVDs about political shit that I'm almost certain they find boring. But hey, they keep coming back. A couple days ago I was eves dropping while my dad was trying to convince them to stop drinking milk. I heard them shout, "rice milk? ALMOND MILK? ewwww!". It was cute.

Cute as it may be, they're in the living room right now playing some freeze tag-type of game. My studio is in the bottom portion of the house. I can hear every word, every movement. each footstep is a loud creek followed by much louder thumps.

There goes recording today.